As you may recall I posted a contest on Friday for the adoption of a Lil’ XT, the winner…an Alliance…is Alystasia!!! Here is the submission that won the pet. Enjoy I sure as hell did.
Subject: Adoption of the XT Machine, Mach LIL.
From: Alystasia, Priestess of the Pointy Light, Stormwind Citadel
Good evening Aunaka,
I have read in your advertisement that you have a new ward in your care needing a place to call home. I hope that I might be able to provide that for him. You called for someone that will give him a stable environment…
The top of the Citadel in Stormwind seems fairly stable!
Let me explain. I’ve been assigned to lookout duty for the king. Local jurisdiction says that priests of the light can’t use the guard towers for lookout duty. “What better place to look out from, than the top of your own tower?” UGH. But I do it because Bishop Farthing bet 50 gold pieces and his parking spot that I wouldn’t be able to do it for more than an hour, and I don’t know if you’ve met him, but I can’t STAND to see his smug grin. Makes me want to break my vows for five minutes and give him a pointy end of my .. er…
Truly, it would be nice to have a companion that could literally toss me up there, not to mention save me the embarrassment of Brother Joshua staring up my robes when I hike up the side. Besides, it gets really lonely up there at times, watching the docks. Especially at night. And if I DO spot trouble in the docks.. ok ok, if I spot drunken gnomes fighting the livestock, I hear your little guy can restore the peace. And maybe blow up Bishop Farthing’s pantaloon cabinet.
In an effort to plead my case for your assistance in pairing me with this companion, please allow me to show you several of my previous (very unsuccessful) attempts to locate and win over companions.
Me: “Hi Lady! Will you be my companion?”
Lady: “Oh hai! Splat!”
Me: “Splat? Is that code for…” (splat!)
“Oh. Splat. Mediiiiiiic….”
Malygos, will YOU be my companion? I will hug you and love you and pet you and.. HEY!
Where are you going?! ARE YOU LEAVING!?!
(As it turns out -Yes. Yes, he is.)
Even my best friend Alysandra couldn’t help me find a companion.. and she’s a DRUID!
Alysandra: “What did the armorer say to the raid leader?”
Illidan: “You are not repaired!”
Thank you for your consideration, please send word by seagull..they seem to enjoy hanging out with me up here.
Sincerely, Alystasia, Priestess of the Pointy Light.
PS: The gnomes are at it again, someone send the fire brigade to hose them down again!
/Cheers
such a cool idea, and a great winner!
Holy cow! I thought surely I’d be disqualified for the horrible jokes! Yay!
Lol, that was great. Congrats.
Haha, Congratulations! That was a fantastic entry!